When the Younger Generation Teaches the Older One

“No matter what I do, it will always be less for you,” said Ananya, frustratedly, to her mother.

Ananya, 27 years old, is an independent woman who works in an MNC and takes care of her mother. Her mother, Sarika, 50 years old, is a homemaker. Ananya is her only child. The ladies lost the man of the family ten years ago. Ananya was a teenager when she lost her father. It was a tough time for the “soft ladies.”

Ananya was her father’s apple of the eye. Since she was the only child — and a girl — she was raised with all the love in the universe. But she wasn’t spoilt. Her upbringing was a mix of fun, learning, values, and innocence. Her presence exuded radiance, purity, and positivity. She brightened every place she walked into.

Her cheerfulness, however, diminished after the demise of her father. Her mother wasn’t literate enough to take up a job, so Ananya started taking tuitions to earn a living. She dedicated her entire life to the well-being of her mother. She sacrificed her adulthood to ensure her “mother’s childhood” sustained.

Ananya worked very hard and became successful. She had an excellent lifestyle. She was no longer middle-class. She had put in all her efforts to create this life for her mother and herself.

Ananya’s mother was a very simple lady — a typical old-generation woman who was never satisfied with others’ work. Although she didn’t mean to hurt anyone, she would always complain about something or the other. She and Ananya would often get into arguments. She would crib about the maid’s work, the house maintenance, the neighbours, and what not.

This bothered Ananya quite a bit. She would often say to herself, “I try to do everything in the best possible way, but this is not sufficient. I need to do better.” Poor Ananya. She thought she was not putting in her maximum effort.

One day, Ananya faced an outburst. She couldn’t control her emotions anymore. She said it out loud to her mother. She confessed that she was exhausted — tired of constantly chasing approval. She was fed up with her mother’s cribbing and dissatisfaction. She was sad to feel that she hadn’t done enough.

Reality hit Ananya’s mother. She contemplated what Ananya had said and realised her mistake. She understood that she was the one who had put her daughter under so much pressure without even realising it. She never thought she could cause such damage to her child. Tears started dripping from her eyes. She told Ananya, “I never understood your situation. Maybe this is what they call a generation gap.” She hugged her daughter tightly and said softly, “I’m sorry, my dear.”

Ananya also cried an ocean and felt guilty for her sudden outburst. She apologised to her mother and promised that she would never let her down. Listening to that, her mother folded her hands in prayer in front of her daughter and said, “You have always been an extraordinary child. It was me who let you down.”

Sometimes we assume that the older generation must always guide the younger one. But life often surprises us. There are moments when children become the teachers, reminding their parents about empathy, understanding, and emotional awareness.

Perhaps the real solution to the generation gap is not age, but the willingness to listen.